The Meaning Of Life
by japnken
Summary: 'Peace and Love on the Planet' influenced Peridot more than you thought. (this is what happens when you overthink the lyrics of a song from a cartoon.)


Steven's song really had her thinking. Was there anything that'd be worth more than peace and love on the planet earth? Peace was the reason she gave up her life on Homeworld. The reason she's rebelled against Yellow Diamond (and not to mention call her a cold). But then she'd wondered and wondered about this mind boggling question Steven had unknowingly challenged her with. She found herself sneaking out of the temple to be alone in the barn, where she had inexplicably found peace.

She made a chart, just like she did once before about the perfect pairing from Camp Pining Hearts (Spoiler alert: it was Percy and Pierre). She'd spent so much time and put in so much thought, yet she still found herself stumped with this riddle.

Life : is to live and to live is to die, Peridot understood clearly. So, life and death were essentially the same thing?

Death : to become distant and forgotten, everything you've 'lived' for wouldn't matter anymore, Peridot charted.

Love : …

That part stayed blank. It's undecided. It seems not even humans can understand this logic yet.

And…. Birth.

To give life?

"But what's the meaning of all this?" Peridot wondered aloud, groaning. "Why does it matter?"

So she asked Steven to sing the song again. This time she found herself gently swaying to the gentle chords he would strum while she quietly mumbled the lyrics along with him. Maybe this could help her understand? She wanted to understand. She had to understand. It bugged her at night and at day and then eventually all the time. But she still couldn't figure it out: is there anything that's worth more than peace and love on the planet earth?

One day she had spotted a tiny red and black dotted insect on a small bush out in the field while working on the drill.

'Working hard is important, but feeling good is important, too,' is what immediately popped into her head just then. And Steven was right about that, wasn't he? She soon found herself sitting cross-legged on the bright green grass while she observed the insect up close in all its glory.

I'm learning.

This is part of life and this is part of Earth's beauties.

It's special, she decided.

This was life. Amidst her meaningless pondering, the insect had spread its thick coated wings and flown away, dissolving away into the vast, clear blue sky. Probably off to nowhere in particular…

Peridot found herself to be fascinated by her new discovery. She wanted to learn more.

Maybe life on Earth peaceful? What if the meaning of life was nature? "It isn't such a big stretch!" Peridot explained to Steven one late evening in the upper decks of the barn. Steven only shrugged and nodded. He had to seem interested or else Peridot would lose it again.

"What if… it all traces back to nature?" She brought her fingers together. "It's possible, right?"

She was beginning to panic.

"Sure." was all he said.

"Okay." Peridot breathes.

Hold it together.

"So, Steven. " She began fondly. "What is the meaning of life?"

"Oh… well, my dad said something about pork chops?" He thought some more and then, "I think the meaning of life is whatever you want it to be."

That made sense, didn't it? Now she had stumped herself with an even bigger question.

What is the meaning of my life?

The following weeks flew by, and then months. She focused on finding a relevant answer to this new question while subconsciously also still trying to answer the first one? At least it kept her busy outside from working on the drill.

That is until… Lapis showed up. By this point, lots of things happened and changed, including Peridot herself. She was a 'Crystal Gem' now.

But now she had a barn mate. She was beautiful. But Lapis most certainly didn't think the same of Peridot. And...that was fine!

But why did she suddenly understand love? Or- at least she thought she did. Was everything finally beginning to come full circle?

Not exactly…

She hadn't even found an answer to the first two questions!

There couldn't be anything worth more than life, she noted. So if there was, it would most definitely be larger than life . Granted, she, again, could not understand for the life of her. And then she asked the same question to Steven and he said, "I guess, but…-"

"But what! But what!" Peridot asked, understandably nearing her wits end.

"I… I dunno, Peridot. No one does."

"AARGH!"

And there went another precious chart, ripped into shreds in the spur of pure rage and hatred for Steven's stupid song.

So?

Peridot gave up. It was all in good spirits this time because she realized it didn't matter or make a difference if she knew or not. So why did she wonder in the first place?

Validation.

Answering these questions would most certainly not bring her satisfaction or validation.

But she wondered one more time.

Was there anything that's worth more than peace and love on the planet Earth?

Who knows?


End file.
